Made a Decision
The Courage to Change
Courage is the willingness to accept fear and act anyway.
It takes courage to face the harsh fact that we are powerless over alcohol and that our lives have become unmanageable.
Facing the truth about our addiction wasn't easy, nor is the process of embracing a new way of life without alcohol, but once we've made that decision a new and better way of living can begin.
The best news is that our Higher Power hands out courage like gumdrops to those who actively ask for it - and then apply it. We don't have to face any of the changes required of us in sobriety alone.
Alcohol is a depressant. Our drinking life became a life of depression. Today we are too blessed to be depressed. And it was/is being willing to change that sets us free.
As Bill W. said way back in 1965:
Let us never fear needed change ... once a need becomes clearly apparent in an individual, in a group, or in A.A. as a whole, it has long since been found out that we cannot stand still and look the other way. The essence of all growth is a willingness to change for the better and then an unremitting willingness to shoulder whatever responsibility this entails.
And what does changing to get and stay sober entail? At its most basic it means we make a daily commitment to remaining sober.
For some that means asking our Higher Power for sobriety each morning upon awakening, and thanking Him that night for our having had another sober day.
Many AA members devote a considerable amount of time to prayer and meditation to get their day started right. Others just check in with their Higher Power throughout the day as needed.
Meetings become a priority and we list in our daily planner which ones we'll be attending that day. We'll list our AA service commitments there, too.
Hanging out with our friends in recovery is also important. They need our support after all ... and we need theirs! Our AA friendships - formed on the anvil of learning how to actually be a good friend - are a vital component of staying sober in our early sobriety. It is where we learn (quite possibly for the first time ever) that friends are not required to be our clones. It is where we begin to learn to appreciate our differences or at least to begin embracing the concept of acceptance!
We all have different opinions, different ways of living, and different ways of working our program. But as long as we're staying sober and doing our best to help others, all of that is OK.
In fact, it's as it should be.
As Bill W. himself also said -
Our very first problem is to accept our present circumstances as they are, ourselves as we are, and the people about us as they are. This is to adopt a realistic humility without which no genuine advance can even begin. Again and again, we shall need to return to that unflattering point of departure.
This is an exercise in acceptance that we can profitably practice every day of our lives. Provided we strenuously avoid turning these realistic surveys of the facts of life into unrealistic alibis for apathy or defeatism, they can be the sure foundation upon which increased emotional health and therefore spiritual progress can be built.
A drinking life is not a normal life. When we drink heavily our bodies take real punishment. Drunks don't eat properly, sleep well, and we live in continual mental turmoil. Excessive alcohol intake physically causes our brains to actually swell, so we go through our drinking life "thinking" with a swollen brain. No wonder we used to make some pretty bad decisions!
A few weeks into sobriety we will begin to notice the difference as our minds clear up and our bodies start to relax. By the time we approach our second sober anniversary we'll probably have more mental and physical energy than we've ever had before.
Progressing in sobriety has been compared to building a house. First the foundation is poured by quitting drinking. Then rooms are added one by one as we begin to work the steps and practice the program. Over time our building skills vastly improve and we are able to furnish our homes comfortably.
I also like the analogy of living sober being a lot like baking a cake. We read a recipe, add the ingredients in order, mix it thoroughly, bake it for a period of time and - voila - we get a cake.
In recovery we read the Big Book (recipe), do what it suggests in order, stir it around though every experience life offers us, and then "bake" it one sober day at a time until - voila - we find ourselves living our sober life, that one "beyond our wildest dreams."
When we arrived in AA a sober life seemed like an impossible dream. It felt unnatural. But as our sober journey progresses we marvel that we ever sought escape in a bottle - or anything else.
Fact - No comfort can be found in "what was" once "what was" has became a death sentence.
Fact - We can't make any progress without making decisions.
Fact - Our program of recovery gives us a blueprint on How to Change for the better.
Fact - Change offers us power.
Fact - Life is about movement. It is meant to be exciting and adventurous.
So go now and live yourself a factual sober life!
Because all this works - when we work it!
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