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Made a Decision.

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Are We Having Fun Yet?

Recovery is a serious business. Staying away from alcohol (and all the other drugs) requires a daily commitment. It is the most important thing we can do, because without our sobriety we stand to lose everything ...  family, job, health, life.

But, as our book tells us, "We are not a grim lot." Nor are we meant to be. In addition to being serious business, recovery is also meant to be joyful. 

We wouldn't let our car chug along burning oil, thumping forward on a flat tire or with banging noises in the engine. Just so, we need to pay attention when recovery feels like it is all work and no play.

If we're sober, but depressed. 

Sober, but unhappy. 

Sober, but feeling like it's all a bit boring ... 

It's time for an AA tune up.

Freedom from alcohol and drugs also frees us to enjoy our recovery and every other aspect of our lives. We find those things that make us happy. We find the fun!

In my first year in sobriety, a friend of mine with the same amount of sober time decided sobriety wasn’t much fun - and I agreed. So on the following Friday night we got all dolled up and went out looking for fun. We ate at a nice restaurant, which was nice, but at that point we drew a blank. Our “fun” had always involved barroom drinking, dancing, and flirting. We discovered we had no idea what to do next. 

What we did was end up at the kitchen table of another friend in early recovery where we drank pots of coffee, gossiped happily about every other member of AA, told each other more of our drinking war stories, and laughed hysterically into the wee hours of the morning. 

For many of us finding fun things to add to our lives means going back in time to our childhood to remember what fun looked like then: 

Roller skating? Football? A doll house? Jumping rope? Bike riding? Drawing pictures? Reading? Building a tree house or snow fort? Hiking in the woods? Playing with our friends?

Once we've scoured memory lane for those tidbits we can consider doing some of those things again. We'll probably find we have outgrown many childhood pleasures, but a few might surprise us by still being quite a nice fit.

We can even invite our children or grandchildren to share in our rediscoveries ... or not.  

We can always opt to share our fun, but we also have the right to be joyous, happy and free on our own if we so choose.  

Sad to say, our years of substance abuse took away our simple delight in just being alive, but recovery can restore it. 

 

Many alcoholics are also workaholics. When we find ourselves forced into having some down time we use it sit around worrying. 

Where's the fun in that?

Discovering the ability to leave the job at quitting time, to rest when we're tired, to discover what we most enjoy - from building a house to just pottering around in the one we have - is the best part of having a sober life.

We must always remember we have a disease of perception. How we view our activities can brighten them with glitter or turn them black.

Prayer and meditation center us, educate us, lift our spirits, provide companionship, and offer us a journey of adventure - 

and/or - 

prayer and meditation are just something we do hurriedly (if done at all) as just one more recovery box to tick.  

Perception!

Service work is where we can grow our recovery by leaps and bounds. Becoming active in our home group, taking a turn chairing, serving as a greeter, helping plan and deliver special events can turn out to be some of the most fun we've ever had ... 

and/or ... 

Service work can be a drudgery to nourish our resentments: 

"THEY expect ME to do everything. Wah, Wah, Wah."  Perception!

If "they" aren't doing-the-doing, "they" aren't reaping all the benefits recovery has to offer. 

It's their loss! 

And they put themselves at risk of a relapse by not doing-the-doing. 

Learning the steps, learning how to use them as tools for living a balanced life, offers us the opportunity to get to know who we really are, to discover our strengths, to experience our talents to the full. 

To not do the steps, to not work them, use them, treasure them - all of them - is to deny ourselves all the benefits of a joyful recovery.

Meetings are our ongoing medicine for treating our disease. And getting to our meetings is one of the best parts of being a member of AA. Knowing we'll see our friends there, getting to laugh with one another, getting to help one another through our bad patches, and celebrate our good times together, is hugely important to our recovery.

It's a good idea to ask ourselves from time to time, 

"Am I having fun yet?" 

 

If my answer is "no," I may be taking myself far too seriously. 

Our lives didn't end when we got sober, they got a reboot. 

Recovery is meant to be fun, too. Go find some!